{"id":571,"date":"2012-11-07T21:55:24","date_gmt":"2012-11-08T05:55:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/abysmalwitch.wordpress.com\/?p=571"},"modified":"2012-11-07T21:55:24","modified_gmt":"2012-11-08T05:55:24","slug":"accept-the-spoons-and-move-on","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/abysmalwitch.com\/index.php\/2012\/11\/07\/accept-the-spoons-and-move-on\/","title":{"rendered":"Accept the Spoons and Move On"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Tonight I was forced to question my grasp on reality.<\/p>\n<p>My sanity was suddenly all it was cracked up to be.<\/p>\n<p>I was putting away the dishes and found a wooden spoon in the cutlery section.<\/p>\n<p>This doesn&#8217;t seem particularly odd.<\/p>\n<p>Except.<\/p>\n<p>I only own two wooden spoons. \u00a0And what I held in my hands wasn&#8217;t one of them.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Love,&#8221; calls I. \u00a0&#8220;Did you use a wooden spoon?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Yes,&#8221; says my love.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Where did you get the spoon?&#8221; asks I.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;From the cutlery drawer,&#8221; he says, &#8220;right beside the other ones.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>OTHER ONES?!?<\/p>\n<p>I looked in the drawer.<\/p>\n<p>Yes, two more spoons squatted insight.<\/p>\n<p>Understand that I exaggerate not at all when I say that I had never seen them before in my life.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Love, did you buy new spoons?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Hope fizzled predictably with his &#8220;Nah, those have been there since I moved in.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>No fucking way.<\/p>\n<p>There was a disagreement for the next several minutes.<\/p>\n<p>My two indefutable \u00a0points:<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>why were we in Ikea looking for more wooden spoons if there were 4 already in the drawer (and not just the one we actually had)?<\/li>\n<li>we&#8217;d cleaned out the drawer together a couple of months ago and there were no such spoons in it then.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p>So we came to the agreement that the spoons had appeared somewhere along the way and that neither of us knew where from.<\/p>\n<p>Meanwhile, I&#8217;d contacted potential suspects&#8211;friends, who could have somehow left wooden spoons in the drawer. \u00a0No go. \u00a0Thankfully they understand this whole process and don&#8217;t consider this my final push over the edge.<\/p>\n<p>But, no, they weren&#8217;t the source of the spoons.<\/p>\n<p>There is no known source for them.<\/p>\n<p>It haunted me.<\/p>\n<p>And then my covenmate reminded me that weirdness is just part of our lives.<\/p>\n<p>The lesson of the day became clear: \u00a0sometimes you just need to accept the spoons and move on.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Tonight I was forced to question my grasp on reality. My sanity was suddenly all it was cracked up to be. I was putting away the dishes and found a wooden spoon in the cutlery section. This doesn&#8217;t seem particularly odd. Except. I only own two wooden spoons. \u00a0And what I held in my hands &hellip; <a href=\"http:\/\/abysmalwitch.com\/index.php\/2012\/11\/07\/accept-the-spoons-and-move-on\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Accept the Spoons and Move On<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[2,12],"tags":[19,166,261],"class_list":["post-571","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-abysmal-musings","category-those-other-days","tag-acceptance","tag-move-on","tag-spoons"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/abysmalwitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/571","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/abysmalwitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/abysmalwitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/abysmalwitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/abysmalwitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=571"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/abysmalwitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/571\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/abysmalwitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=571"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/abysmalwitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=571"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/abysmalwitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=571"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}