Rain! no Sun! No Rain! No, wait, sun. Ah, no, that would be rain. Except, oh yes, back to sun.

My life is like the weather.

Our weather here.

We had a slow start in the Lower Mainland (of British Columbia) to summer this year.  The days were cold, the weather dreary.  I rather loved it.

Finally the sun came!

Oh, but then there was rain.  And then sun.  Then back to rain.  These days we start with overcast and potentially rainy and finish with sunny.  Mostly.

You’d think the weather fey were confused or something.

Sure, realistically, it probably has more to do with the volcano eruption earlier this year than with unseen metaphysical or mythical (depending on your viewpoint) creatures, but it’s still been all over the place annoying.

Rather like my mood.  It’s up!  It’s down! It’s, oh, wait.  No, my mood hasn’t been that erratic.  Especially once you factor in the pms hormones.  Which must be factored in upon the pain of agonizing dismemberment and long-delayed death (why on earth would people say death and dismemberment?  the only real threat in dismemberment is to do it before the person dies.  Really, the logic failures that happen in standard phrases, it’s disheartening).

But while my mood hasn’t been quite so quick to change as the weather has, it still meanders from one side of the emotion pole to the other.  With stable periods and quick shifts and constant change in a background of familiarity.

What does it all come back to?  And thank you, Patrick, for reminding me of why we suffer through such pain (see previous post “Dissatisfaction”).  It’s because we’re here to live.

And strangely, living isn’t always happy, easy, joyful.

Sometimes it’s agonizing, idiotic and disgusting.

This is a good thing.  Like the weather, if our moods only had one flavour, one expression, then the rest of our existence, from body to psyche, would start to fail (if weather was only sunny, plants would die, if only rainy, they would drown and again die).  In my opinion.  And phrased that way because it works particularly well with the weather analogy.  But it’s still true.  If we were in a matrix, whole crops of human batteries would be lost if the matrix was made to be happy 24/7.  🙂

You know it’s a good day when you can use a movie reference in your blog.

Hello, sunbeam! (yes, one just came out).  Guess it’s time to get back to living.  Oh, right, that would be working, given that the lunch hour’s nearly over.

May the weather of your life leave you healthy, flourishing and well-nourished just like a healthy forest or field.

~Abysmal Witch.


I hate days like this.

There is an underlying pall that wants to drag me down into…I don’t even know where.  Ha!  A lie!  I have a damn fine idea of where.

It’s all nicely hidden at the moment.  A general malaise.  A sense of dissatisfaction with my world but without inclination to do something different.  A quiet burble of sadness happening at a level just below awareness.

The familiar questions:  am I on the right path?  If so, then why this feeling?  If it’s not the right path, then where else should I be traveling?

Heart-tired, soul-tired, body-tired, mind-dazed, all different ways of saying sadness.

Sneaking up on me for days.  No idea at all where it’s going to take me or even if I will let it take me anywhere.  Such a fine line between exploring negative thoughts for the purpose of embracing/releasing them and falling prey to them.

There’s no where else to go with this for right now.  Will work.  Will feel (gah!).  Will find a way through.

It’s the dark forest at night, when all you want to do is get home to the safety and comfort of your bed, but the owls call to each other around you and the outside chill is sneaking into your bones and bringing with it the stirrings of fear.  And the only way out is to move your feet forward and walk yourself home.